function randInt(min,max)
{
var div = (max - min) + 1
var randNum = Math.random()
for (var i = 0; i <= div - 1; i++)
{
if (randNum >= i / div && randNum < (i+1) / div)
{return i + min}
}
}
var abc = randInt(1,75);
if (abc == 1) {
document.write("We borrowed golf from Scotland as we borrowed whiskey. Not because it is Scottish, but because it is good. - Horace Hutchinson");
}
if (abc == 2) {
document.write("If you're going to teach golf, accept the large responsibility of having an impact on people's lives and strive every day to be the best. - Charlie King");
}
if (abc == 3) {
document.write("I’d rather play golf and break even, than work hard and come out ahead. - Mike Donald");
}
if (abc == 4) {
document.write("Golf is a game of putting little balls into little holes with instruments singularly ill-adapted for the purpose. - Horace Hutchinson");
}
if (abc == 5) {
document.write("You have to play the rules of golf just as you have to live by the rules of life. There's no other way. - Babe Didrikson");
}
if (abc == 6) {
document.write("I still swing the way I used to, but when I look up, the ball is going in a different direction. - Lee Trevino");
}
if (abc == 7) {
document.write("Golf is like faith: it is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. - Arnold Houltain");
}
if (abc == 8) {
document.write("There's an old saying, 'It's a poor craftsman who blames his tools.' It's usually the player who misses those three-footers, not the putter. - Kathy Whitworth");
}
if (abc == 9) {
document.write("Golf is a good walk spoiled. - Mark Twain");
}
if (abc == 10) {
document.write("Golf is the most fun you can have without taking off your clothes. - ChiChi Rodriguez");
}
if (abc == 11) {
document.write("Golf is wonderful exercise. You can stand on your feet for hours, watching somebody else putt. - Will Rogers");
}
if (abc == 12) {
document.write("Golf is an awkward set of bodily contortions designed to produce a graceful result. - Thomas D. Armour");
}
if (abc == 13) {
document.write("That does look like a very good exercise. But what is the little white ball for? - Ulysses S. Grant");
}
if (abc == 14) {
document.write("Golf is a game that creates emotions that sometimes cannot be sustained with the club still in one’s hand. - Bobby Jones");
}
if (abc == 15) {
document.write("There’s no better game in the world when you are in good company, and no worse game when you are in bad company. - Tommy Bolt");
}
if (abc == 16) {
document.write("If you watch a game, it’s fun. If you play it, it’s recreation. If you work at it, it’s golf. - Bob Hope");
}
if (abc == 17) {
document.write("Golf, more than most games, has a number of clichés, often successfully disguised as tips, so watch out! - Kathy Whitworth");
}
if (abc == 18) {
document.write("I just loosen my girdle and let the ball have it. - Babe Zaharias");
}
if (abc == 19) {
document.write("You can’t go into a shop and buy a good game of golf. - Sam Snead");
}
if (abc == 20) {
document.write("Give me my golf clubs, fresh air and a beautiful partner, and you can keep my golf clubs and the fresh air. - Jack Benny");
}
if (abc == 21) {
document.write("Why waste good shots in practice when you might need them in a match? - Walter Hagen");
}
if (abc == 22) {
document.write("Golf matches are not won on the fairways or greens. They are won on the tee-the first tee. - Bobby Riggs");
}
if (abc == 22) {
document.write("After taking the stance it is too late to worry. The only thing to do then is to hit the ball. - Bobby Jones");
}
if (abc == 24) {
document.write("Take the mystery out of the swing, keep it simple. - Joe Norwood");
}
if (abc == 25) {
document.write("You’re the best teacher I’ve ever seen. You’re a genius, you know why? It takes one to know one. - Chi Chi Rodriguez talking about Joe Norwood.");
}
if (abc == 26) {
document.write("One of the reasons why I, a medical man, decided to give up medicine was a firm conviction of the extraordinary influence on health of pleasurable excitement, especially when combined with fresh air and exercise. How frequently have I, with great difficulty, persuaded patients who were never off my doorsteps to take up golf, and how rarely, if ever, I have seen them in my consulting room again. - Alister MacKenzie");
}
if (abc == 27) {
document.write("What is the mystery of golf? Whenever I ask myself that question I am always reminded of the joke that Woody Allen tells in the movie Annie Hall, which basically goes like this, Doctor, Doctor, I have a terrible problem - my brother thinks he’s a chicken. That’s crazy says the doctor, just tell him he’s not a chicken. I can’t, the man says, I need the eggs That’s me. That’s why I keep coming back to this game of golf - bogeys, birdies, disappointments, and thrills - because I need the eggs. - Marty Parkes");
}
if (abc == 28) {
document.write("It is a thousand pities that neither Aristotle nor Shakespeare was a golfer. - Author Unknown");
}
if (abc == 29) {
document.write("There is no other game that strips the soul so naked. - Horace Hutchinson");
}
if (abc == 30) {
document.write("When I'm on a golf course and it starts to rain and lightning, I hold up my one iron, 'cause I know even God can't hit a one iron. - Lee Trevino");
}
if (abc == 31) {
document.write("I'll always remember the day I broke ninety. I had a few beers in the clubhouse and was so excited I forgot to play the back nine. - Bruce Lansky");
}
if (abc == 32) {
document.write("As you walk ; down the fairway of life you must smell the roses, for you only get to play on round. - Walter Hagan");
}
if (abc == 33) {
document.write("My best score ever was 103, but I've only been playing 15 years. - Alex Karris");
}
if (abc == 34) {
document.write("Golf is the hardest game in the world to play, and the easiest to cheat at. - Dave Hill");
}
if (abc == 35) {
document.write("Never bet with anyone you meet on the first tee, who has a deep suntan, a one iron in his bag and squinty eyes. - Dave Marr");
}
if (abc == 36) {
document.write("The golf swing is like sex. You can't be thinking about the mechanics of the act while you are performing. - Dave Hill");
}
if (abc == 37) {
document.write("Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into a even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose. - Winston Churchill");
}
if (abc == 38) {
document.write("Relax? How can anybody relax and play golf? You have to grip the club don't you? - Ben Hogan");
}
if (abc == 39) {
document.write("You don't know what pressure is until you've played for five dollars a hole with only two in your pocket.- Lee Trevino");
}
if (abc == 40) {
document.write("Golf is a game in which you yell 'fore', shoot six and write down five. - Paul Harvey");
}
if (abc == 41) {
document.write("A lot of guys who have never choked, have never been in the position to do so. - Tom Watson");
}
if (abc == 42) {
document.write("I'm hitting the woods just great, but I'm having a terrible time getting out of them - Harry Tofcano");
}
if (abc == 43) {
document.write("Golf is a game where guts and blind devotion will always net you absolutely nothing but an ulcer. - Tommy Bolt");
}
if (abc == 44) {
document.write("Golf is based on honesty, where else would you admit to a seven on a par three? - Jimmy Demaret");
}
if (abc == 45) {
document.write("It's nice to have the opportunity to play for so much money, but it's nicer to win it. - Patty Sheenan");
}
if (abc == 46) {
document.write("I play with friends, but we don't play friendly games. - Ben Hogan");
}
if (abc == 47) {
document.write("Golf is an ideal diversion, but a ruinous disease. - Bertie Forbes");
}
if (abc == 48) {
document.write("Putts get real difficult the day they hand out the money. - Lee Trevino");
}
if (abc == 49) {
document.write("There are no points for style when it comes to putting. It's getting the ball in the cup that counts. - Brian Swarbrick");
}
if (abc == 50) {
document.write("Golf is twenty percent mechanics and technique. The other eighty percent is philosophy, humor, tragedy, romance, melodrama, companionship, camaraderie, cussedness, and conversation. - Grantland Rice");
}
if (abc == 51) {
document.write("The harder you work, the luckier you get. - Gary Player");
}
if (abc == 52) {
document.write("Victory is everything. You can spend the money, but you can never spend the memories. - Ken Venturi");
}
if (abc == 53) {
document.write("Golf is 90 percent inspiration and 10 percent perspiration. - Johnny Miller");
}
if (abc == 54) {
document.write("I play with friends, but we don't play friendly games. - Ben Hogan");
}
if (abc == 55) {
document.write("If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. - Dean Martin");
}
if (abc == 56) {
document.write("I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles. - G.K. Chesterton");
}
if (abc == 57) {
document.write("They throw their clubs backwards, and that's wrong. You should always throw a club ahead of you so that you don't have to walk any extra distance to get it. - Tommy Bolt");
}
if (abc == 58) {
document.write("If you break 100, watch your golf. If you break 80, watch your business. - Joey Adams");
}
if (abc == 59) {
document.write(" Man blames fate for other accidents but feels personally responsible for a hole in one. - Martha Beckman");
}
if (abc == 60) {
document.write("When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. - Author Unknown");
}
if (abc == 61) {
document.write("I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced. - Miller Barber");
}
if (abc == 62) {
document.write("Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing. - Ben Hogan");
}
if (abc == 63) {
document.write("I learn something new about the game almost every time I step on the course. - Ben Hogan");
}
if (abc == 64) {
document.write("Relax? How can anybody relax and play golf? You have to grip the club don't you? - Ben Hogan");
}
if (abc == 65) {
document.write("Golf gives you an insight into human nature, your own as well as your opponent's. - Grantland Rice");
}
if (abc == 65) {
document.write("I’m gambling that when we get into the next life, Saint Peter will look at us and ask, ‘Golfer?’ And when we nod, he will stop aside and say, ‘Go right in, you’ve suffered enough.’ One warning though, if you go in and the first thing you see is a par three surrounded by water, it ain’t heaven. - Jim Murray");
}
if (abc == 67) {
document.write("Never bet with anyone you meet on the first tee who has a deep suntan, a one-iron, and squinty eyes. - Dave Marr");
}
if (abc == 68) {
document.write("She’s been out there watching me hit balls. It’s interesting, she kind of shakes every time I hit a shot like she gets excited. ... She’s never going to beat me, though. Tiger Woods On 1-year-old daughter Sam’s golf ability.");
}
if (abc == 69) {
document.write("Because of questions of all kinds, reams of additional detail must be made available - but separately, and probably endlessly. Homer Kelly");
}
if (abc == 70) {
document.write("A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort - Hunter S Thompson");
}
if (abc == 71) {
document.write("Real golfers go to work to relax. - George Dillon");
}
if (abc == 72) {
document.write("A golf hole, humanly speaking, is like life, in as much as one cannot judge justly of any person’s character the first time one meets him. Sometimes it takes years to discover and appreciate hidden qualities which only time discloses, and he usually discloses them on the links. - C.B. Macdonald");
}
if (abc == 73) {
document.write("The correct swing is performed by the entire body under a head that is practically stationary. - Bobby Jones");
}
if (abc == 74) {
document.write("Because of questions of all kinds, reams of additional detail must be made available - but separately, and probably endlessly. - Homer Kelly");
}
if (abc == 75) {
document.write("I don't exaggerate - I just remember big. - Chi Chi Rodriguez");
}